Let's get some closure on this a year later. I went back to test adding layers and since Windows has updated, graphics drivers have updated and of course Isadora has updated I wasn't getting the same numbers. But relatively, using the RTX was still quite a bit higher than using the Intel GPU when looking at Isadora's load stat. Although DusX was right, adding more layers and effects added less load on the RTX above its base. On the other hand, the mystery was about Isadora's ability to run a show and keep up FPS in a given config so I'm still concentrating on that load meter.
So still unexpected swingy numbers. That is, until I found one setting I'd somehow missed this whole time. In the NVIDIA Control Panel there's a setting for power management, which I set it to prefer maximum performance and rebooted.
Suddenly the test show wouldn't break the 8% barrier on RTX, within a percentage point or two of what Intel is showing now. The setting had different options on some other computers I looked at, but its equivalent was present and did give me lower and stable load. So problem solved, missing one setting can make things weird.
Also, the show I was given to test is sort of a mess. Different file formats, codecs, sizes and frame rates getting mixed sure didn't help things.